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Four of the estimated forty-seven million uninsured Americans comprised this quartet. “Perhaps there are others hiding behind their profligate ways,” asserts California health insurance agent Matt Lockard.

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Chauncey McBride earned $75K per year as a top salesman for an Oxnard-based copy machine chain. His attractive fiancée Irene earned almost as much from the Thousand Oaks bagel shop she owned. Their friends Rick and Brianca each earned six figures as rising attorneys specializing in Elderly Law. On Tuesdays, Thursdays, Fridays, and Saturdays they’d dress to the max and “do lunch” at Diamond Jim’s, where a lamb chop swimming in mint gravy cost fifty bucks. Irene and Brianca liked to wear designer jewelry; earrings, broaches, even anklets if the truth be known. Chauncey and Rick looked liked the male models gracing the pages of GQ. One night, these four successful twenty-somethings chanced to meet an acquaintance of their parents, Matt Lockard – successful in his own right as a California health insurance agent. The restaurant’s owner was a sensible man, even if he catered to expensive tastes.

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“Howdy Jim,” Matt said, “I brought over that change in your policy you wanted.”

“Howdy Matt,” said Diamond Jim, “We’re still busy from the lunch crowd. Why don’t you take a seat next to those two couples waiting for a table? It’ll just be a few minutes.” 

“Okay,” Matt said, sitting down alongside Rick and Brianca. He sat still for a few seconds, until he was recognized.

“Hey,” said Brianca, “I know you. We all know you. You’re Matt Lockard.”

“Still shilling health insurance?” asked Chauncey, with his slightly abrasive tone.

“Yeah,” echoed the others, their voices merging in a kind of yuppie meld, “you’re that health insurance guy.”

Matt had been put off guard, but he soon recovered. “Do any of you have health insurance?” he said. It was then that he discovered their secret. None of them did. “Why don’t you?” Matt asked, nobly taking the offensive.

“We can’t afford it,” came the trill of a quartet harmonious only in their will to remain oblivious. Matt knew that a low cost policy would probably cost each of them less than the price of their lunch.  But he was tactful to the last. “Oh,” Matt said.

Diamond Jim intervened, ending an uncomfortable tension. “Come into my office Matt.”

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Stian had never been considered especially responsible by his parents – until he “popped the question” to a helpful California health insurance agent.

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 He was blonde, tall, handsome and invincible according to his peers, a group of fellow 24-year-olds considered equally invincible by each other. All of them were recent college graduates prone to taking incredible risks. Bryan, a heavy-set version of Stian, liked to hang glide off the steepest California cliff faces, catching the first thermal while shouting madly in his counterfeit Dylanesque twang, “You don’t need a weatherman to see which way the wind blows.” Angela, an emaciated version of Bryan, did roulette drugs by needle just “for the thrill of it.” Carrie, a Gothic version of Angela, enjoyed being buried alive and popping up unexpectedly in the manner of her cinematic namesake.

Stian would run barefoot through rattlesnake pits with one of his friends holding a stopwatch as he raced to and fro. “Do it again,” Angela would trill, “You’re so funny.” Carrie would pop up like a tart and sometimes Bryan would glide into view, usually with a beer in his left hand, the sinister one.

“Where did he come from?” they’d all ask, except for Stian, who was concentrating on the pit vipers.

But one day Stian’s parents Joe and Flo came by to bring their son a latte. “What do you think you’re doing?” asked a horrified Joe.

“He’s twenty-four and still doesn’t have the sense of a pet rock,” murmured Flo.

“You’d think he’d at least have health insurance when he pulls these stunts.” Joe told his wife, still in a state of shock for the moment instead of The Golden State, “But no-o, not our irresponsible son.”

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Stian gingerly stopped his antics with the snakes and stepped out of the pit as if he’d been bitten. He’d overheard what his parents had been saying about him. He was sobbing as he walked past an incredulous Angela, Carrie, and Bryan straight to his parents, also incredulous.  “Here’s your latte,” his mother said, attempting to hand it to him.

“Hold onto that,” Stian said, still teary-eyed, “just hand me your cell.” Flo’s cell phone was pink, with black crocodiles on the receiver.

“Who are you going to call?” Joe asked softly.

Through a drizzle of tears, came the answer, rather defiantly, “Your California health insurance agent. I’ll bet she has a low cost plan for people my age.”

“That’s my boy,” said Flo, her own tears forming.

“He’s a man, not a boy anymore,” Joe replied, choking up too. “Stian knows what he’s doing.”

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James Elbert thought his family too odd for inclusion in a health insurance plan. But customizing a family plan for the Elbert’s was quite do-able.

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The Elberts, James, wife Jane, and the kids – Patrick, Jorel, and Wendy – at first glance epitomized the average American family living in La Puente. Dark-haired with pleasant, angular faces, they weren’t ugly; each was well-spoken and polite, although Wendy the youngest was only nine.  On second glance, one noticed that each of them possessed seven fingers on each hand, and if their bare feet were inspected, seven toes on each foot. When 17-year-old Jorel was in an accident at the factory, he proved to be less than a Superman; one of two left index fingers had been nearly severed at the second joint in a slicing machine. At the hospital, Jorel came in with his Dad. The first question asked by an on-duty intake woman seemed like a given, “Do you have insurance young man?” The teenager was lapsing into shock, but managed to look at his father who handled the visual cue appropriately. “No, he doesn’t,” the seven-fingered man admitted. “Why not?” the diligent hospital employee asked, musing about bills never paid when patients prove indigent. When James scratched his forehead in plain view, she considered if she wasn’t being given an extra finger or two. She finally smiled pleasantly when the man assumed responsibility then and there. “I’ll sign for the bills!”

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Jorel was admitted, and the hospital saved his finger.

But this incident gave way to serious soul-searching on the part of Mr. Elbert. “Why don’t we have a family plan?” he pondered. Deep down, he knew. During his otherwise uneventful childhood, James had been told by a wizened grandmother figure living in the home that because he had seven digits on each limb, that he was cursed, and if he ever married a woman with more digits than she was entitled to “by a just God,” then at the very least their family would someday be categorically denied family health insurance coverage. Still, he possessed extraordinary courage and picked up the phone, his fingers like a spider’s legs, and called the first California health insurance agent that came into view.

It was Matt Lockard. After hearing the story, he made his comment succinct. “Wizened grandmother figures always say that in situations like yours. That’s why they don’t sell family plans.”

To learn more please visit: http://www.mattsinsurance4ca.com

Mattsinsurance4ca.com is a licensed health insurance agent in California. They provide instant online quote for health insurance, Medicare Supplements, travel health insurance, and child only health insurance.

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